When something happens that I didn’t expect I can just say: So what!

I am a man of faith so I know that if there are any major consequences it has either been planned or is already known by God. And for me to have come so far it’s quite obvious that He loves me and I love Him.

So why would I worry?

I know that this sounds weird but I wish that everyone could have my experience.

From the moment that I wake up each morning I think about what I have to do that day. Then I get up and go about what I have to do.

I work now from home. I do volunteer work now and since it’s from home I don’t have to get dressed or meet anyone but what I do is available to anyone and it’s for God.

In the mornings I start working at about 6:45 A.M. and as soon as I have something going I play solitaire. My mind can’t just sit around and do nothing…

Then I make sure that work is being done and I go to the kitchen for lunch and I start thinking. And if I think of something that is important I do some research and write to you. And that’s what I’ve done today but no matter what work takes precedence.

I ate lunch and here is what came to my mind:

Ps 139:13-16

13 For you created my inmost being;
you knit me together in my mother's womb.
14 I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
your works are wonderful,
I know that full well.
15 My frame was not hidden from you
when I was made in the secret place.
When I was woven together in the depths of the earth,
16 your eyes saw my unformed body.
All the days ordained for me
were written in your book
before one of them came to be.

Now this is in God’s word and it’s clear. He knows me and He was there.

So if all the days were ordained for me before one of them came to be how could I know my purpose? I wasn’t even born yet! And it says FOR ME so I had nothing to do with it!

But people think that they know their purpose but the Bible says that they don’t. They may be aware of things that they like to do or things that other human people say that they are good at but the Bible says that they were not even born when their purpose was ordained by God.

That puts a whole different picture on things.

If someone said to me “you don’t know my purpose” then I would say “yes I do. You were created by God to serve Him”. They may or may not agree with that now, but in time they will.

I am a little concerned.

I don’t think that people realize what I am saying.

To have to come up with a purpose for your life seems to me to be ignoring the fact that God created you before you were born. Life is not here to please me. I’m here to please God. And to come up with a purpose that completely focuses on you and what you can do instead of who created you to me is simply ignoring God and focusing on yourself.

That is the way of this world but it is not the way of God our creator.

God gave me this life. I used serve myself and now I’m severely handicapped but thank God in not dead.

I’m alive and only here to serve Him.

If you don’t understand that then fine.

People quite often say “I was born to do this…” or “Maybe I was born to do that…”.

However, in Psalm 139 I read:
Ps 139:13

13 Oh yes, you shaped me first inside, then out;
you formed me in my mother's womb.

And
Ps 139:15
You know exactly how I was made, bit by bit,
how I was sculpted from nothing into something.

And

Ps 139:16
16 Like an open book, you watched me grow from conception to birth;
all the stages of my life were spread out before you,
The days of my life all prepared
before I'd even lived one day.

So there’s no “I was” or “maybe” when someone is born because God did it and you were born as part of His will!

So many people go through their lives trying to determine why they are here. But God very clearly answers that question in Psalm 139!

So if we would teach that instead of who killed who and who won the war we would likely be better people!

Can you imagine if shows were for how people could help God instead of what a person could do to help themselves?

How could this happen to me?

I see and hear this all the time on TV.

The first question that comes to me is WHO ARE YOU?

The Son of God was arrested, beaten and nailed to a cross and that was to save us. So if that happened to Him then why would someone say: how could this happen to me?

I’m nothing and no one else is either when compared to God.

We’re Christians. What does that mean? It means we’re like Christ. Now to properly understand what that means we have to look at Christ. Not so much as what we or the world thinks about Him but what God told us.

Christ helped the Father create the world.

Why did He come?

To save us because we were lost.

Weren’t we good people already?

No we were all sinners.

So He came anyway?

Yes, because He loved us.

We were bad but good came to us and stayed until He saved us.

Wasn’t this simple for Him to do?

No but He did it.

That view is true but it’s a long way from what the world sees. And it’s closer to what I view.

To me, Jesus has already made me right so I’m now part of His family, so as I approach people it’s from His perspective, do they need Jesus? Who doesn’t? So I spend time with them and teach them because Jesus in me loves them.

And that’s way different from what I see going on.

People say that they are Christians but they often think that they’re better than others but as a Christian I’m not better I have been forgiven and that’s all.

You too.

We’re still the same people and we’re still human and we would still be lost if it wasn’t for Christ. So as a Christian I want to do what He did. How about you?

A friend of mine once gave me this verse and it means a lot to me:

Luke 12:48
From everyone who has been given much, much will be demanded; and from the one who has been entrusted with much, much more will be asked.

This is true with me.

At one time I was considered to be a genius but now my abilities have put me in a place where I’m no longer considered to be so smart.

I have had some psychological testing and much has still been given but life is showing me that much is still expected. So now I have to accomplish much as I am.

Forgiven

I looked on the Internet to see if I could find a meaning for the word forgiven and in my opinion I found one that I like a lot. It said that you are no longer required to pay back a debt that you owe.

The reason that I like that definition is that it doesn’t say a debt you never borrowed, no it says that you are no longer required to pay back a debt that you owe.

That is the way I view it. Yes we sin because we are human but we have been forgiven by God! Meaning yes it happens but we are no longer required to pay for it.

So it is not like it doesn’t happen because it does but you are not required to pay it back anymore. Why? Because Jesus paid for it! It’s a debt that you no longer owe.

So do we care about sin? Yes! Right is still right and wrong is still wrong but with God we are no longer responsible for fixing it. God no longer expects US to fix it because Jesus did!

It’s often thought that if you have to deal with a handicapped person things will be more difficult than if you were dealing with a normal person. But here is a handicapped person telling you that’s not true!

As a handicapped man I am on the phone just as much as you are having to correct mistakes that normal people make. I have to follow through and check out everything that is done by others to make sure that it is correct.

And often it’s not.

So it’s time that we changed the way that we think because right is right and wrong is wrong and anyone can make a mistake.

I talked to you about this before but it is real and you may not realize it. But it’s bigger than I thought so it may be bigger than you know.

I wrote once before about “Societal Christians” versus actual Christians. The difference is that the first once is mainly concerned with what society feels and the second is concerned just with how God feels. The first = daily acceptance from those around them and the second = daily rejection and negativity from those around them but God is still God.

Obviously the first is much easier and it feels more rewarding so that is the way that people have gone for centuries.

But remember when Jesus came? Society didn’t like Him and they killed Him but He rose from the grave, ascended into Heaven and joined His Father.

So be very careful about who you are pleasing because all of those who were pleased are dead and gone but God is still God

I am just me and you are just you. Thankfully God made us that way. So, to begin with we were different. And no matter what you may think, that’s normal and it’s good.

I am not going to think like you do because I’m not you.

No one but me has gone through what I have gone through. I’m in a good place today and I have no idea where I’ll be tomorrow but thankfully God knows.

Some people have been a little hard on me lately and it has hurt me. I can understand where they’re coming from but I’m just me the way God made me to be and you are just you as God made you to be.

So we can accept each other as God accepts each of us. Learn from each other and appreciate the differences. I do and you can too. We have the same Father and He knows what He is doing.

Sunday I went to Church and the preacher was saying “In my prayer life…” and I realized what he was talking about but I thought “I don’t have something separate that I call my prayer life because my whole life is prayer!”.

So I thought that I should write to you.

God is our Father and He takes care of us even when we don’t know it. He is also always with us. So why would we have something separate that we called our “prayer life”?

To me that says that part of my life is for prayer and another part of my life is for …”

Think of a small child. Do they ever set aside time to speak to their parent? No! They just talk and the parent is listening.

Well we are God’s children and He is listening so if we only give Him specified “time” what does that tell Him?

It tells Him that He is important to you when you dedicate time to Him but you do much more and He can observe but your time is not dedicated fully to Him.

What would an earthly parent say to that?

They would say “fine but you’re not my child from now on”. But God never says that. He just waits to see if we will change our minds and include Him.

I thought about this much earlier but most people are not like me so I was initially afraid that you wouldn’t get it so I didn’t write it. But after time and prayer I am going to write it.

I see a lot of personal wishing and second guessing of God going on but what I have gone through and still go through leaves no room for any of that and I’m right here in front of you. So if you don’t see it then that’s your choice.

From before I was born I know that God has been with me. I say that because it’s in His word and because I was severely abused many times but I don’t remember a thing. There have been many things that have happened over the years that have clearly pointed to this abuse but at the time I simply never connected the dots. But now that I have so much time on my hands and I have studied the Bible and have talked to so many educated people it’s pretty clear to me.

So why am I telling you this?

Because regardless of what has happened to me and God has been there all along I just don’t think that people understand and believe that God has a purpose and He will achieve it!

Yes we are involved but we aren’t His only reason for everything. He has a will and it’s not ours it is His. But because He’s our Father He will take care of us but it will be His way and NOT our way.

I’m totally happy with that but I don’t think that everyone is. But after 51 years and so many changes I am!

So praise God!

As humans things are supposed to always be the same. We work hard to build things that we can depend on. We have things like laws, degrees and compensation to monitor and ensure these things. And we learn to expect things to always happen a certain way. And these things become expectations

But as normal Christians things are not always the same and that’s OK. Remember Jesus telling us that we must first deny ourselves? Well part of denying yourself means that #1 Life is not your game because God is calling the shots! And because you do not know God’s plans or reasons things may not always happen the same way thus you cannot depend on things.

So when something happens that you did not expect you have to honestly say that your desire is for God’s will to be done and not your own personal desires to always be met. And that’s easy for me to say but it’s not easy to do.

But as a Christian you have no other choice because it’s not about you anymore it’s about God. Remember being told to deny yourself?

So sometimes things may happen that you didn’t expect.

But who are you? Did you create the world? Or seasons? Or people? No you didn’t but God did. Will you be in control at judgment? No God will. So relax! You’re under His wing. It’s His game and He has already won so you can trust Him.

I have often wondered why I was still here but on Sunday my Church had Disability Sunday and this scripture was mentioned several times:

1 Cor 12:22
22 On the contrary, those parts of the body that seem to be weaker are indispensable
NIV

And I was shocked!

Indispensable.

I‘ve never been treated that way by this world, but you can read it just the same as I can: indispensable.

Not just OK or make due with them, no, indispensable!

So after 10 years and much rejection I finally see that I’m indispensable, so a lot of people have a lot to learn.

I know that they do because I did too!

Every show on TV is about what you can do. What YOU can do seems to the large human interest.

Satan used to demonsrate the same interest and maybe he still has that same interest.

Think about it.

As humans we have:

Clothes
Hair styles
Schools
Degrees
Jobs
Income
Churches
Etc.
to name a few.

But who could create a world, all of the animals, the seasons, the weather, feed 5,000 people with little to no food, make blind people see, heal diseases or bring the dead to life? Humans? No but God does.

Oh, so is there a competition to be better than God?

Well there was before. Remember when Satan was an Angel? Remember Adam & Eve in the garden? Remember the fordidden fruit? Remember the darkness that people pefer?

It's all coming back now, isn't it?

And was Jesus the light?

Do I mean that things are the same nowadays as they were in Jesus day? Yes I do.

The same as they were in Adam & Eve's day.

There is still darkness in is world but we are the light. As long as this world is here there will be darkness so just stay in the light. God has already conquered Satan. He said: I have conquered the world.

regardless of what happens in the world God created us for His glory so nothing can change that.

We have got to start thinking differently.

Jesus told us that we have to deny ourselves and take up our cross and follow Him and what that means, I think, is that things don't depend on us anymore. Things are not going to make us happy or be what we want for them to be but it's not our game it's God's game.

So don't be so concerned with your personal satisfaction rather be concerned that what you're doing is in God's word. That's how you know that what you're doing or thinking is good. If God put it in His word.

Things can happen and they might be good or bad but how you, a Christian, reacts to them makes all of the difference.

For example things may not happen as you wanted them to or think that they should but when that happens (and it will) just ask yourself:
Who is my Father?
Who's child am I?
Is my Father a loser?

And all of the sudden things will come into much clearer perspective so you can move forward.

The fact that darkness exists is real and whether you knew it or realized it before: This is a war and you are being used to fight it.

The winner will win and the loser will lose but how you play the game determines how you will spend eternity.

So “right now” is no longer so critical because eternity is critical.

As I become more and more like I used to be I am more and more aware and amazed at what God has done for me.

There have been so many and more than I even know of times that I needed Him and He was there. To make Psalm 129 more clear He has been my Father.

And it's not like I have always told Him! Because I often didn't even know! But when I needed Him He was there for me. Now what earthly father can do that? None.

Oh yeah, He's my God!

I'm experiencing something that I didn't expect at all.

I'm trying to be a “virtual volunteer” because then no one would have to pay for anything at all and I could do something to help out with something. But I continue to just run into huge walls and I don't understand why.

If I were a usual person then I would have no problems but I'm not usual and I have TONS of problems!

I could understand if I was expecting to be paid or had a bad reputation as a volunteer but I'm not and I don't.

It seems as though I have to just go with things however they are or just forget it but at least shut up, but I expect more!

I'm not normal but I am intelligent and I should be allowed to help someone and I know that I am not alone.

It would be fine if I would just accept things as they are but I am not as I was and I want to help! This is wasting a lot of my time and energy.