I've now been to court, I've testified & it's done (without any incident). So I'll have to wait now to hear what the Judge decides. But regarless of the decision, I felt His help and that's all I need.

Last night I didn’t sleep well and yet another song was going through my head. It said God is here. He is with us telling us to trust in Him. What a thing! After a difficult night, I needed to hear that!

He is so incredibly patient with us. We’re quick to say that we’re just passing through but it’s not easy to say that we’re just spectators. Yet in Psalms is says:
16 Like an open book, you watched me grow from conception to birth; all the stages of my life were spread out before you,
So, He has already seen our life before! What is going to happen WILL HAPPEN and although we haven’t seen it before, today WILL HAPPEN because it already has. It’s just a rerun.

That’s difficult at best for me to accept this, and it may be for you too. I’m going to court today and I’m wondering what will happen and hoping for results but it has already happened and God himself knows it and has approved it, so it will happen. It’s just a rerun.

I just need to simply accept that, and so do you. That’s a completely different perspective on life. Completely different and difficult to accept. Very difficult. But the scriptures are God’s word. So it’s true.

Today is already a difficult day, and it’s only 4A.M.

Yesterday was very difficult too.

The day before was extremely difficult as well.

I don’t know what tomorrow will be but I’m not going to hold my breath…

Unbeknownst to me my alarm went off this morning and woke me up. I tried to go back to bed and I couldn’t.

But this song kept playing over and over in my head saying: Holy, Holy, Holy God… And I decided: That’s not common especially at 4 in the morning so I decided to get up again and write to you.

So, I got back up intent on writing to you, but I choked very strongly on my pills and decided to go quickly to solve a problem from yesterday and my Internet connection would not return the right results, so yet another bad day? Or should I listen again to the words of that song?

So I listened. And I thought: This is not just another bad day, no listen to the song. It’s telling you not to believe it’s just another bad day, it’s reminding you that He’s holy. End of story. He would never leave you, He wouldn’t, so He’s there and He’s holy, no matter what happens in this World. You’re ok, because He’s with you. Think again…

And so I wrote to you first.

Yes, after 3 bad days the last thing that I needed to worry about was how holy God was… But maybe I should think about it.

You know that when BAD piles up, it’s easy and common to just think that you’re all alone and what you believe in has failed you, but that’s Satan’s goal.

I was just eating breakfast and I thought I am in a different place now…

Before, I was probably fairly normal. Intelligent but a normal person. But now, I’m not a normal person at all. No, normality said that I should be dead or a vegetable, but I’m not.

Every day is filled with things that seem good to me.

Last week I attended a board meeting on the phone and I wrote many things down, followed the instructions, knew who would be there, anticipated responses and all the while I managed a service person at my home!

Now if that’s not more than I could ask or imagine then excuse me, it was! Looking back, I was shocked!

Then I started realizing that my mere existence is controlled by God! He is always there. He controls my sleep and everything that I do. My life on this Earth is possible because of Him. I’m in an extremely different place now. And it’s been nearly 9 years since my attack and I’m still alive and still progressing!

Before, everything was about me, but I found Christ, had faith, and now everything is about Him. This is an extremely different place to be when compared to a usual person that is in this world. I do recall noting that even before my attack. That tells me that there is a purpose for me. There always has been and there always will be.

Think about it. Really. Think about it. When I go to sleep He’s there, He stays there by me when I’m asleep. He keeps me alive. He’s there when I wake up and begin each day. He’s there when I go through each day, all through each day until I go to bed each night. He’s always there.

He is there with you too.

Oh yeah, I’m blessed but so are you.

This is not just me, it’s about you too!

Unmerited


Unmerited very simply means: undeserved. God’s Grace is undeserved favor from Him even though when Christ came we were all sinners.

You didn’t do anything to earn forgiveness from God, it was given to you. You weren’t changed but you were accepted by God as you are.

People have always assumed that they have been made acceptable if they are accepted by God. But that is not true! They have been accepted. Period. That’s what makes Grace unbelievable.

It’s more than you can possibly imagine. We know what God wants and we’re clearly not there, but we have been accepted by God. That is unbelievable. Even more than you know.

In songs and prayers I hear: Create in me a clean heart & make me clean again…and I often wonder what it means.

Because even when we were unacceptable to God, He gave us Jesus and Grace. We were not changed, that is not possible, no, we were given Grace. We are still the same people and we do what we do, but against all odds we have been forgiven and accepted.

Even the Apostle Paul initially had problems believing and understanding this! Remember his stones that he prayed about? No one actually knows what his stones were but he was afraid that he was unacceptable to God, but Jesus told him that His grace was sufficient and the “stones” were not changed.

So my point is that you need to believe what “has been done” for you. Not where you should be or want to be. You have been given grace & you are accepted by God.

Paul’s stones didn’t matter and neither do yours.